last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize
