I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize