Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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