So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
My vagina is officially offended.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
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