well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize