I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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