Duck Duck Cougar?
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
He shit in the fireplace
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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