Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize
