Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Randomize
