She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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