I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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