I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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