I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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