So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
