how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
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