Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Randomize
