actually, I'm a sock model
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Randomize
