The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
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