I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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