he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
