google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
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