Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
so much tequila, so little girl.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
I see more hoeing in ur future
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