Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
