I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
