Im at strip club and am horny
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
