he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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