You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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