I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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