so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
