My sheets look like a crime scene.
she looked like the before picture.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
