do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
