I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
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