Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
