my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
