Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
