It's like God shit irony all over that family
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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