So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
