me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Randomize
