is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
