I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Randomize