when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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