HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Randomize
