Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
