I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Alive.
So much puke
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize