There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
