There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
