Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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