Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Randomize