brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
