This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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